Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Crazy Nipplephobes are on the march...

Fly, my pretties, go get that Ubermilf!

Clearly, she's part of the ultra-right-wing conspiracy against tolerance and acceptance of what's clearly the greatest issue facing humanity today: the right to have a superfluous nipple.

Having an extra nipple is not a choice we make -- we're born that way. Or at least the lucky ones are. Do you think we just wake up one day and say "Man, I think today I'll have three nipples?" Jiminy, no!

Here's part of her hatemongering...
God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Eve and Adam's Third Nipple. These people are not part of His plan. They shouldn't be able to adopt children, they shouldn't be allowed to teach children, and for goodness sakes, don't let them marry!
Save me Jeebus, from crazies like this. First of all, it hasn't been proven Adam and Eve DIDN'T have three nipples each... but it was probably only one of them. Someone had to pass that gene down to the rest of us. Eve, most likely, since hers always seem to be hidden by those leaves (what's she trying to hide?), but who's to say that some nipplephobe didn't airbrush Adam's extra nipple out of that painting on the Sistine Chapel? Dang revisionist painters...


Übermilf said...

Quit flaunting your nipples, freak!

pluckymama said...

I told her about my 9 nipples. We'll see how she does with that :)

Johnny Yola said...

This is some funny writing you've got here. I'm having a blast.

Anonymous said...

sure they are not spots? if they arnt your passport should be confiscated and your 'file' deleted.

Nubin said...

glad i was born in this
day and time..
but my extra nipple does give me
special powers.
you know, the usual:
i can see dead people,
get anyone i want naked..
umm, ya know.

and once again,
sorry i feel like attacking your blogs... NUBIN!!

Patty O'Furniture said...

LMAO that's my nipple photoshop art! You stole that from my myspace or my superfluous nipple group at

Dread Pirate Robert said...

Patty, you're the original artist?

Truly, I applaud your taste.

I got the image from the post I'm criticizing, the one by ubermilf -- I thought she did it.

Holla and I'll link to your site and give you the credit you deserve. Email me at!

Übermilf said...

I keep getting visitors from your site from this.

I hope everyone knows it was satire. It's been a long time since I wrote it, so...

it was meant as a satire of unreasonable and stupid prejudices. I think nipples are just swell. I fed my babies with them!